i think iskandar's mom is the 2nd coolest mom next to mine...we spoke on the phone and she told me a couple of things before i move in to the teck whye flat. she was cool about it i appreciate really her kindness.
so, im going to move in, officially 2nd day raya...which is sunday but ill start clearing and cleaning up tumoro if im not shagged out...should be a-ok ar...i dont dare frankly to stay alone yet...id wait for Is to move in on sunday...
im much more pretty excited rather than sad now...a little sad still but Is made me feel like more at home, more like a long lost brother...
thnks ratnor for the photoshop....and bro, maybe can skate together sometimes since we are nearer...heh!
sayang, i love u, sorry im a little bz just now....
gnite peeps
coolness
one after another
i dunno whats happening, i tot things getting better in a way or another but it appears not to be what i expected...its like one after another kinda thingy u know if melayu cakap "macam jatuh di timpa tangga..." its like one blow after another...well what can i do, this is fate and probably God's way of testing me....just accept lor and try my best to change it to be better or at least adapt to it...
haiz....i tot at least id be smiling a little on top of all the frownings but i guess now the smiles are merely smiles for the sake of smiling not a smile from deep within. emo arent i? i cant help it....its happening...i know....i just know...
i dont know la, i dont know wats happening...
i just want to get away....from everything for sometime....cant wait for the vacations. i think id love to try travelling alone...will i have the balls to do it? hmm.... we'll see, if things really gets worse....ill definitely do it...i need something to release the tension...
conflicting
conflicting feelings/thoughts is really engulfing me....id so want to leave but at the same time i feel sad leaving....cos i know id be alone....like no family at all... but id want to leave cos i cant stand that annoying moron anymore....
watever it is, i know im capable of looking after myself....although tough, struggling, i always managed to come up with means and ways to survive. for instance, i sold my rare shoes, parka, accessories just to make ends meet....i never borrowed...it was only once i did borrow....and i paid back immediately a few hours later cos i had cash at home stashed somewhere but my acc was empty. im not arrogant here nor proud, i think im just glad that god helped me out, god provide me with brains and capabilities to survive in this unkind world, where dog-eat-dog and backstabbing is a favourite past-time.
i just hope ill survive on my own, i know i will, i know i can...next couple of weeks is going to be spent studying and not sulking over the mishap that the moronic figure had caused. im strong, i know i am and i will go ahead with life...pursue what i believe in, try the best i can to get it....
skinnymunster replied and suggested i meet his partner up to discuss further as to how i can gain exposure to my silly tees...i know its simple and nothing fancy-smancy but i hope ppl will like it. and i hope that skinnymunster will help me sell my tees as well...
keeping the faith, keeping the dreams alive...
un-underground
initially i only wanted my tees to be underground, i mean not sold mainstream but after what has happened to me i decide to submit my designs to skinnymunster and noise.sg when i come up with better designs....ill pick a few and send in...and hope that they'd like it and hopefully i get to sell my tees...its ambitious but actually its a means of survival for me now...if i can manage to make extra bucks from the tees i make why not.
im going to get annie to help me sew the labels on my tees, i hope she knows how to or at least i can teach her....let try a few samples....
Z, is pretty silent about the wedding thingy...i really hope it gets kickin so dough starts coming in...i need to save up reely....
adil becomes the saviour...well, he gains as well....and with monthly money coming in, 50bucks will go to funding my tees...the rest to utilities bills and others. i intend to save at least 50bucks every month from NOW. its for the future dey....id want to own my own apartment, not just renting or seeking refuge at a frens place.
since now id be living on my own....i need to be not so lazy....i need to clean up the HOUSE not only ROOM....i think its the least i can do for Is who let me put up at his place. im only worried about the supernatural he mentioned....u see im not a real tough guy when it comes to ghosts...hehehehe....anyways im looking forward to it, i cant wait to move out...ill visit mom every week of course...shes the bestest mom on earth....
i just hope when im stable enough, next year when i graduated, i want to get married and get a flat of my own...
gotta iron clothes....taaa...
thanks a million Is....
god loves me
god loves me...everytime i plunge down to the ground, theres solutions that brought me up on my feet again....
its either bedok or teck whye...i would prefer teck whye cos its within my 'comfort zone' im near my frens at bukit batok, near mom and near my sayang annie... i hope iskandar's mom gives the green light and if so, ill be moving in soon...i pray that god will repay iskandar's good deed...
for sale
im selling away my vespa.....i just need to fund myself till july...pls help. call me for info. thnks.
sick of this life im living
sometimes i just wished i got that job i wanted years ago....by now id be living on my own already happily....cos probably id can afford it....
im my own fault for the life im living now....i dont blame anyone else....
if i were to progressed sooner....have a stable pay, i wouldnt be stuck in this hell-hole.
aiyah, everyones avoiding....when ure in a lurch...its always like this...
im tearing now....but im holding it back...cos im telling myself...im strong....i can. i will fuck him...
why..
i wonder why...
anyways, haiqal got his photos exhibited at lomography exhibition today and tommorow.. wanna go down take a look....but none of my frens are lomo fans....who uses 35mm film camera nowadays? very rare...now is the digital era where film cameras are frowned upon for its inconvenience and bcos dg have the ability to view what uve taken but film cameras are like mysteries, if ure in luck, ur fotos turns out beautiful.....if not they will be just under or over exposed.....well isnt that more like life? u never know what u gonna get...
life....have been pretty colourful for me....i had many jobs...in many fields...i tried different stuffs, although im one of the few who progressed late but ive had a colourful life....i experienced alot of things along the way...i learnt a lesson of life never taught in school or by parents....
but for now.....what id love to do, is just settle down....and pursue my 'hobby' and hopefully it goes a long way...and hopefully when i retire (comfortably), i got something to show my kids...this was what daddy do.....and i can teach my kids too, lessons in life...so they dont have to go thru what ive been thru which wasnt pleasant at times.
i dunno
i dunno...well i dunno...
will i? will i not? i dunno....
this big fat boy is fearful....seriously.
i just wanna be someone
went down to kallang to get the frames i ordered last friday....phew....cost me $45 thats inclusive of gst......and i tot id get a squeeze...my estimation was maybe less than 10bucks...but it cost me another $16++. the salesperson asked me....business ar? i say, hobby....she asked profit? i repeated, hobby...then she noticed my uniform, "u work in a hospital??". i nodded, "yup.." "your interest is in here but u work in a hospital?" i replied, "i cant survive on this, nurse stable...." then she smiled and said good, yadayada.....well at least she encouraged.....was frenly nuff to introduce me to certain products....which i only now know....the emulsion remover...wooohoo thatll save me some bucks...
retard
retard...
i guess the guys im hearing alot about are retards. would u keep pestering on someone who's already attached and try as though hopefully they'd break up so u can have that someone? pure retard.....pure retard....wheres ur god damn balls?
fuck them ar, ball-less....i know how shahreil feels now......damn retard those guys, its either their stupid or they are retards.....i despise guys like them, met them so many times in my life....pure retards....
malas
so malas....clinical placements like this one is such a drag....i think ill enjoy ot and mental health more....sigh....
ive never had...
ive never had a gf who fetched me from work....
ive never had a gf who make me jellies brought it all the way from bukit panjang to tan tock seng for me to eat...
ive never had a gf like annie before....
love u dear....
...
dear, i love u, wat more can i say;
i miss you, every night and everyday.
from the time i wake up,
till my eyes close for the day.
even when im down,
i'm all smiles around you.
even when i frown,
i was never pushed away from you.
u light up the darkness,
u light up my life.
with you around,
i enjoy living my life.
i'd pray this last forever.
separate, hopefully never.
i've never felt this before,
the first love i felt with no flaw.
fatty bom-bom
when i looked into the fotos i developed....ouh my gosh, i am a fatty bom-bom...when can i get my figure back when i was a team-leader or during ns? where i can wear size 30 instead of the now 34-36....uggghh...my mom told me...better slim down!...hahaha yeah i will..if i can do it once, i can again....
silly-happy
she held out her little finger and asked me to make a promise. i think she is the only one sincere enough to ask me to do that. im so happy.
only one thing lurks....blessings.
adzwan whipped up cool cream pasta....thnks adzwan and the rest brought food bought, ranging from chickwings, doughnuts, etc. i brought diy jelly, failed at first try cos i put too much fruits. adzwan's dad was a cool one....and gosh...somehow or another we are related....small world isnt it...
im so lazy....this time round clinical placement is such a drag....probably its cos its fasting month? nah dont think so...rather i guess cos most of the patients is bed-bound and has dementia.....its a tough call nursing elderlies...believe me. i cant wait for my placement at IMH cos i know ill enjoy that...
this is what goes daily in my mind.....finish this & next semester clean, get that class 3, buy a car(im taking ur advise adzwan's dad), save up for marriage.
gotta go...wanna collect the developed fotos...
a B
i forgot to mention.....Zhiyuan sms me when i was half asleep in the morning....an unbelievable news....i expected to get a C only for my bio prac....BUT I GOT A 'B'! WOOTS.....unbelievable but i guess i got lucky...
fun
we had lotsa fun just now.....initially it was tiring and frustating cos we never found what we were looking for a yellowish/orangish baju for annie to match mine...but turns out the guys going visiting 3rd week which happens to be annie's cuzzen's wedding, therefore she cant tag along...mebbe on the sunday she could....
after the unsuccessful find.....we head to brickworks to meet leo and guys to break fast. the food was fine except the table, a little cramped....its nice eating together be it family or frens....although the food is mediocre but the feeling of eating together beats any nice food.....after downing rice, seafood and all....we came to the funnest thing of the day.....the luge....was our first time...and i had lotsa fun, i bet annie did too and the rest of the guys...i got stuck in the first run, the 2nd run i went fast and was too engrossed that i didnt realise annie got stuck and left behind, panick a little but lucky nuff dizzy was there...thnks dizzy....the 3rd run, i never let her go out of my sight...it was fun...and i didnt expected it to be able to go fast. i think i wanna bring fathih and ayun down one of these days....i too wanna go again...hehehe...
i bet annie had fun today....we ended the day at habib...drinks and annie was hungry, so we had chickchoprice.....she fed me...hehehe felt so pampered....anyways finally i finished my roll of 36....yeayness tumoro can develop!!!...im loving annie daily...
i havent been the jamie-oliver wannabe for a long time...tumoro adzwan having a breaking-fast cum potluck kinda thingy....now im thinking...wat should i whip up...fried marcaroni? fried rice?...hmm if i had an oven, i can bake a pizza or 2...
hmm maybe ill make dessert...woots....yeah desserts!, ill borrow mommy's cookbook tumoro....
im a happy boy today.....i love annie, i love my frens....u guys made my day today. and leo thanks for the luge rides....was one hell of an experience...
Hallucinate on.
Hallucinate caps out now for sale at SGD32!
Embroided on quality flexfit caps, available in L/XL, pre-order of other sizes available upon request!
personalized candy bars
zahidah told me to try and create personalized candy bar wrappers for her, the candy bars or chocolates will be used as 'berkats' or door gifts(?) for malay weddings. I came up with one so far, cos she asked me on such short notice...i didnt know to use whose names as sample names....so i decided shahreil and yati since they are getting married soon...hehe...so do u like it? and would u buy?
civilized?
if we were in the barbaric age, god knows what wouldve happened....probably a huge club wouldve landed on his head just to wake the bugger up.....and rather shut him down. if we were in the early human civilization, probably id already give him a good beating... if it were in the hang tuah era, my tamingsari wouldve been depressed deep into his flesh. if it were in the era where legislation and law were not that established probably he'd get a good pounding of my fist. BUT we are now living in a so called civilized world.....but still some ppl behave like animals....
if ure lazy to work, ud probably use an excuse to be exempt from work. watever it is, its ur fucken business. when u use what i did as a fucken excuse, it becomes my fucken business and i wish i could clobber u dead or with the knowledge i have just plunge that needle fully loaded with potassium. its not once, twice or even thrice, its been years of tolerance and sometimes i just couldnt take it. ppl who wouldnt understand or not living under the same roof probably would say, "just buat bodoh la...y take it to heart when u know his like that..." im not perfect and ive changed from being temperamental to patient and still i can feel the heartache...its not easy.......my mom told me what happened when im away, he's the usual no balls guy who talks behind my back or when we ended up quarelling, he's scream at the top of his lungs senseless and stupid invalid statements before hiding himself in his room like a little girl...probably on diapers in case he wet his pants. he's the ultimate king of backstabbers and hypocrites.
this was wat he said last night, "tak boleh cat rumah la semalam radio kuat kepala pening..."(i cannot paint the house just now, the radio was switched on loud, headache). so that was the excuse so that he need not go to work today reason being he will only paint today bcos yest, the radio-playing caused his headache. when my mom told me....i was like WTF...pissed and ubberly upset! ok let me tell u....i came back home at 3+ yest, nobody was home....until he came home close to 4pm, can u finish painting within 3hrs before buka? surely not...the whole living room? the other day he spent the whole day just to paint cloudy whites which is so ubber ugly and awful looking. so it was just a pure excuse at my expense, certainly he had no intention to paint, else he wouldve started early like last week and not went out only to be back at 4pm. this is just one of his ugly behavior....theres still many not mentioned....
this entry has been an angry one and it kinda soothing to jot it down here...watever it is i shall not be angry cos of such a spastic individual, not worth it....im trying to keep my cool.....deep breathes and exercise to sweat out.....hopefully endorphins will be released and i will be in a lighter better mood...insyahallah...
he just purely disses me off....i cant wait to start work and be able to afford my own apartment.
tired
it was an early knock off today but that doesnt mean im not tired.....i spun my uniforms when i got home....i tot id lie down awhile...i end up asleep only to be awaken by laughters on the radio.....then i realised i slept like 1.5hours....haiz.. thats ok...im suppose to come up with designs for choc bar wrappers for a fren...and i havent done nuts...
so i switched on the pc with ol-skool wu tang playing on itunes...then mom knocked on the door....i opened....i was pissed when mom showed the slip from posto....apparently, mr postman was knocking on the door to deliver the much awaited ltd edition hallucinate caps....but my selfish stepfather decided to pretend he's asleep and not open the door. watever la....so i tot id collect it direct from the post office....called sayang, to meet me slightly earlier...i was excited and i already ordered 3 frames for printing hallucinaTees....so annie came down earlier...i ironed my purple tee, wore my black berms which i couldnt fit into before ramadhan....then head down to the post office with my sayang....but to my horror, the caps are not there, i didnt read the slip, it says 1 or 2 working days later, the item can be collected at nearest post office.... Ugggh...nvm that, so we head to microscreen to collect my frames....halfway thru at PIE toa payoh...it rained....so i made a filter out...got wet and we had no choice but stop there abandon collecting the frames cos they close at 7pm and decide to break fast there.... had a sumptous meal of halal chinese food at fork and spoon.......i tried to forget about the 2 mishaps....sigh....then at toa payoh, i got the fake crocs which i will be using for my OT postings...at least i got something today, useful of course....
we decide to head for geylang when the rain stopped completely cos lazing around at east coast chit-chatting isnt a good idea since it just rained awhile ago...walked around...had that nice chendol, showed annie around, window shopping basically....
we ran into mankey and lin at tkc...then we tagged along with them...then i saw awing-songkoks at a shop....and got meself a spanking high songkok, i like....then annie got these brooches for herself and my sis......then mankey got this nice samarinda which will be used as samping for his baju...we were all happy and ended the day at habib, with a couple of drinks and laughters....had fun today... lots...
im loving annie more each day.......gd night peeps, gd night sayang....cant wait to go visiting with u in that purple baju and probably golden-yellow ones if ure getting
love ya....see ya soon in a couple of hours....hehe
lost
lost.
having muscular twitches/spasms at the scapula area....maybe im just tired or its bcos of the fall i had.
i dunno la.
love, sweet
i love u sooo much for...
accepting me the way i am,
wanting to sacrifice,
understanding our differences,
wanting a future with me,
making living my life wonderful,
making me look forward to everyday,
making sleepless nights less dreadful,
willing to take the risk with approvals from parents,
changing ur ways to make me happy,
loving me,
making me happy everyday,
showing me what love really is,
and many more, the list could go on....
i only wished....
i met u earlier before u got a religion,
i met u earlier before the girls before u broke my heart,
u are a muslim too,
more ppl have an open mind,
u can be by my side 24/7,
i still have my paternal father with me,
and many more i wished....
watever it is, i hope u know how i feel about u, though this entry might make some puke blood but its how i feel....so i dont care
gotta sleep, see ya guys around. love ya annie.
hee
yeah i know i should be getting ready for my clinicals but im just mesmerized by this foto when i was playing with my fone, isnt she sweet? annie, in her first baju kurung. love ya sayang.....miss ya..
i love this foto taken by my sayang...of my room....soon itll be orange walls, no more black n pink......sayonara....look out for new foto in a couple of weeks time!
mom met annie, mom seems ok with annie....except like not expecting her son to bring back a chinese girl.....she talked with annie but i guess annie was too shy to talk much...heh....
i love my sayang.....yes, i mean what i say....gnite peepz.
1st month
time flies....and its oredi a month that we've been together...love u sayang... hope 'beary-sid' the bear i bought u just now will accompany u whenever im not by ur side. love ya lots....ure my angel alright....hope to meet u tumoro....hope we'd really go visiting in that shade of purple bajus....:).....
ubber cool
multi-tasking,
chatting with annie, surfing the net, laundry, packing stuff for tumoro, getting ready but this is ubber cool....
OH MY GOD!
Diana, my ex bbss schoolmate is now studying sports at ngee ann part time....thats not exciting but whats exciting is her lecturer is Chris Haslam's mom!!!! and guess what im getting Chris Haslam to wear hallucinate tees.....im giving one of my tees once its printed to Diana to pass to her lecturer who will pass it to Chris Haslam!
Am i realising my dreams or what? woots!
hahaha and chris haslam is a december baby too!....he'll be getting hallucinate tees on 19th December if everything goes well.
nurse doesnt equal to occupation
i dont see nursing as job....
daily, im sharing what i know with ppl around me...
and giving advice to my fren whose father is diabetic and hypertensive, really made me think that ive answered the calling...and nursing does come in handy......im worried bout myself too....cos my late grandfather have CVA(cardiovascular accident) or stroke.
im worried about one thing though....wen i graduate, will i still be as enthusiastic or will the routine in my job makes me less enthusiastic?....well thats another thing..
was telling ratnor...i hope to be an APN one day.
my annie is feeling better...im glad i was not the cause....but id like to find out why too.....im meeting her later...i love her and im ubber excited...
gtg shower guys...see ya...
sigh
ok....i might have been to irritating and probably not understanding enough... i dunno, i might've been paranoid, just paranoid....i dunno....watever it is, i am sorry.
i would love to blame the past but its me, its not the past....i have no intention to hurt anyone but if i did, i am sorry.
i think ill just go to bed, what is done, is done.
im considering to get class 3, i might have to depart with something i love but its my decision, nobody have the right to tell me what to do. ill decide soon and roy, ull be such a lucky ass...well, we'll see.....
im eye-ing on four wheels....no more two wheels...although the sight of the red roadking at adil's carpark just now, made my heart stomp awhile......although that roaring ducati that passed by us just now made me want a bigger bike....but i guess id be going for that 4-wheels...but not as yet....only when im a staff nurse......
im not in a pleasant mood either....i just hope annie gets better.....i dunno wat to do, seriously....i like just turned dumb.....
i just want you to know, the whole time im outside with my frens....i kept thinking about u, how ure doing, whether ure feeling better and if it was my fault that u felt lousy, when i saw that baju, i visualized how ud look in it but then i remembered u felt lousy and all i could think of is how u are doing. im not 1bit sleepy right now bcos i am still thinking of u, how u are doing and all. im sorry if i caused u to feel lousy, i really am.
gtg....see ya guys around....monday my clinicals day...i hope the old folks at ward 7a can cheer me up or something......
im just pissed off at dumb guys....thats all.....
whale of time...
although our date was kinda simple, it was a great one....
we broke fast at clementi ave4.....my fav chick chop....wasnt as marvelous as i remembered...maybe becos they had many orders.....but anyways the serving is still generous and at $4 its worth it.....annie had rice and chick-chop.....then after break fast and the end of drama-serial, we head to queensway to change the shoe i got for my sis.....we were lucky there were new models, so might as well get the new model....the salesperson was great, my experience at kappa queensway was great.....we went window shopping and i think i need a new pair of specs.....and maybe shoes for attachment?
and....uggh...my clutch is giving me problem....i think id still need to fork out that 100bucks for new clutch......i think i wont use sliding roller anymore cos apparently wat they say is true about ok clutch worn off faster with sliding roller....uggh
anyways....i think id continue tumoro....cos i want to talk with my annie....seee ya..
ouh love ya guys....and love ya annie....
sigh
last day of school today.....after this ill have 10 weeks of hospital attachments plus 4 exam papers in between.....
im exhausted when i reach home....i guess its the hot sun....
got my rear tyre changed.....metzeller....just to share with my frens why michellin-pilot slippery when it rains.....jackye told me...(thats what i like about goin to jackye to service my bike, he shares info) michellin-pilot is great initially but after 4months of usage, the compound tend to be harder thus equals to lesser grip on rainy days... on hot days its fine cos the heat on the tar will cause the tyre to soften abit and grip....
im not a mechanic but im pretty ok with vespas and experience does come in handy...the sound made by my bike when torque is required is made by the clutch, turns out true...
so probably id need to spend $100 on stock clutch next month or $220 on delta clutch. tempted to get delta but then thought of changing bike. i asked jackye about x8-400, he said its pretty new so no reviews here but some good news about the bike....it uses the same engine as what currently the nexus-500 is using except it runs on smaller block n piston! i was like "woots!" i was like a kid excited about a new transformer toy. he even said this, "if u have the cash, mod, change the block n piston and you'll have an x8-500!!!(but itll be illegal!) ok, jackye tempted me enuff but it doesnt stop there..
i told jackye i tot of changing before my bike turns 3, he said ya....usually after 3 years theres alot of wear and tear and there'll be alot of spending and replacements to do.....ugghhh....he sure is tempting me to change....
then again its not simple as, ok, i change x8 next year...theres always the temptation for harley(i saw a cool one at annie's place yest), ktm545 and hayabusa(i saw one on the way to school the other day). ughhh boys will be boys....
annie...ure like a blessing....u make me happy....ouh sayang...ive found yoshi...hehe
im pretty broke now.....but i still need to stock up on toiletries...next week ill be on clinicals plus id have to revise when im at home cos exams 4 weeks ago....and weekends im dedicating the time to home and annie, so ill be pretty busy....
the boys are going to change the braking-fast venue next week to al-azhar, im glad.. although i appear like im the bad guy or spoilt sport that refuses to pay 26bucks for a buffet that probably i wouldn't have the capacity to eat becos its the fasting month, ure not really hungry at the point of breaking fast, only thirsty and thus i dont find it worth the money. but i made my point and im glad they changed the plan and ill be there...
be meeting annie later.....break fast with her....she's fasting, she's trying and im giving her all the encouragements i can.
gotta go...
boo ya...
bio SUCK
ok its not bio suck...its me who suck....urrghhh it was a tough paper....we were pampered the previous semesters cos the prac test came in between the semester which meant less topics tested on....but this time round, it took place at the end of the semester...uggggh.....i think id be happy with a D or C.....i have to really mugg for the final paper in order to get a C.....i was telling annie....seems like id have to start studying now and make sure, the central nervous system anatomy and physiology is at the back of my hands.....
i can, i can, i know i can.....
sorry leo, i pass on the buffet....dont really fancy buffets....some more breaking fast time....i doubt i can eat alot.....heh...
im trying to put bio behind for awhile.....need to give time to relax and start again. id go intensive and make sure ill impress dr.raj in my final paper....i will, i can and i will amaze.....:) discipline, thats all....im not stupid...im smart, i know.
thnks
thnks for ur support....i dont want to go into details cos things could go wrong, theres a possibility right? but on demonicspeed multiply site, another potential fan had shown interest and requesting in female sizes....im considering but first the screens....after fixing my toilet light, i guess i want to experiment doing my own lightbox but in the mean time, i still need boy's help....anyways, id keep it going. im staying optimistic.
finally
after almost a week of darkness in the toilet or flickering lights....i got it fixed just now....no its not that i did not change the bulb, i did already, changed starter and all....but it was still flickering....so just now i tested the new bulb in my room, it worked perfectly fine....then i noticed....the watts, and ampere...lucky i have some knowledge, somehow the voltage regulator/converter watever it is was not sufficient for the new generation of bulbs...last time the small round bulbs were only 18-20 watts... the new generation of flourescents comes only in 22watts/0.4 ampere.....so i bought the 6.50bucks converter/regulator thingy....and after breaking a couple of sweats....wala..
its fixed.....im the handyman/diy/bike-repaire/nurse....hehehehe ouh should i add /skateboarder/graffiti-artist/doodler/actor? heheheh i played many roles in my life nowadays on top of all those im also a fren/bf/son/brother/student/cuzzen i played multiple roles....my pay should be like 10k or more instead of only 1k....hehehe..
adios studying biology....
inspired
ive always been on the wrong track....NO, NO dont get me wrong, I love nursing, especially psychiatric nursing.....its my other love....no, not skateboarding...i know i can never go pro....its creating...i dont want to call it designing cos to me its more creating.....and im no designer...
im inspired when i read sunday times.....sheikh was featured....and amanda ang...they both pursued what they love to do....and like me, they never had the resources...so they worked to it....and fazli, one of the featured artist worked part-time while pursing music....
i have a thing for doodling, creating and just scribbling on practically everything... i remembered when i painted a silhouette of a skateboarder on my walls with my name on it with paints i bought for merely less than $2.....yes i was trying to be CREATive like i said, i like creating....i drew on my canvas shoes....i got laughed at, at times... and then when computers came into my life...i 'manipulated' fotos....i changed the head of luke skywalker to my head.....hehehe.....then i did somemore...i doodled, i scribbled in class....i painted my first scooter with paintbrush white.....who the hell paints their bike with a paintbrush? I did...hurhurhur.....i still remembered in sec school, where everyone was jamming and stuffs.....i wrote a song at age 15, though i was laughed at, cos it was titled 'Hamburger' hahaha....then i remembered i did a comic book for my english project, "Askmee & CdiQ" two superheroes named after me and a classmate of mine.....i practically enjoyed creating....all sorts....its just sheer, pure enjoyment....then wen i was exposed more to design stuffs, i joined Noise.SG and created my animation which actually got selected and featured in 2005....i was invited lately via e-mail to blog on their site should i have anymore new works....i was tempted to blog about my hallucinate thingy.....but i guess ill wait till it kick off...im already psyched up when sheikh offered to list my shirts online and a fren wanted my 'lucha' tee and another fren wants to use my creations for wedding cards....but first....please read on the next para...
prioritize.....nursing...thats what will bring me into the future...thats my main priority, psychiatric nursing, thats what i want to achieve first.....ill do my 'creations' only when im free.....and when im stable enough i will still do it 'part-time' but perhaps go deeper cos i got the resources to finance myself....
id just want to share my enthusiasm with ppl who read my blog....go pursue what u like but do not forget about responsibilities.....
well, who knows one day ud see 'hallucinate' in major department stores or who knows Noise.sg would feature my works again....who knows, who knows if i never try...
visit
big monsters?
itchy butt me, now still not asleep, tot of sleeping but decided to browse thru singaporebikes classifieds.....itching for new ride...was browsing...a couple of sportsters on sale....hurhurhurhur....but keep telling myself "NO SIDDIQ!, EVEN IF YOU WANT TO, GET A NEW ONE!" hahaha have to edit the tot again and stike out the even if u want, get a new one....cos if i never strike out that one, i think i might lor....still lingering thru the back of my mind though....
some of the delicious bike ive viewed and kinda drooled over.....busa, sportster, ktm525......and that orange fazer with carbon slip ons.....
i already told adil yest, my butt itch for a new bigger monster....but my only worry if i got class 3 i might want to get a car.....then what happen to the big monster....then just now my mind was scheming with evil plans....."BUY THE BIG BIKE, THEN BUY THE CHEAPO SKIPPER....GILERA TRADE IN, THEN GOT MONEY TO BUY CAR ALSO MAH, OUH VESPA LAY UP, KEEP IN HOUSE...." Wah lau.....hehehehe NO, NO, NO, resist...i must...hehehe
wait la, patience la, maybe until at least i draw my full pay..and got my class3, then can consider....ugggghhh....eeeeeee...
brrr
brrr....weather is cold....not helping in my revisions...half the time im sleepy...
brrr.....and blocked nose...urrrrghhh.....
ouh ive got haiqal his bday prezzie...hope he likes it, its not new but i hope it works...hurhurhur...ouh shit he got a clue oredi...hope he's not reading my blog... ugggh....hahaha...
fascinated, boys will be boys
im always fascinated with cool things.....parkour is one of them, the first time i witness them when yamakasi was screened.....but too bad my weak knees and my weight, else, i guess id be trying out too...hurhurhur...
enjoy the spectacular performance by the famous david belle...
and mind u, he's getting sponsored by nike to do those crazy stunts....urrghh...jealous sia...
horoscopes
i know in islam we are not allowed to believe in horoscopes cos no humans can predict the future.....but i just had to read out of curiosity...and i blurted out in laughter when i read mine, the heading at friendster's free horoscope, it went something like this....."Your enthusiasm can make things happen. Don't keep all that power to yourself." take note the word "power".......
anyways if u take it literally ud be bursting out into laughter like me...if a schizo patient read it, probably he would go telling everyone he has powers....but actually enthusiasm is indeed a sort of "power"....enthusiasm did indeed made me accomplish certain things.....enthusiasm leads to optimistic thinking and that leads to some of my success.....and for that i would agree to that initial sentence of the horoscope....
ratnor was online....i asked him...."have u ever skated in the planes at ur workplace before?". he answered "i wish..." hehehe itd be fun though if we get too....heheheh
annie is a wonderful girl....i cant stop mentioning her....i think its been a long, long time since ive been this much in love before....its not one sided, its not efforts on one side only...it doesnt lack in communication and it doesnt lack in understanding. the only upsetting issue is certain differences that we have to overcome...well actually one because race is not much of a problem....ugghhh...
i wonder what my frens are doing......i hate weekends actually cos thats where i hear very little of them.....they'll bug me weekdays but ill be bz weekdays...urrghhh this is adulthood, nobody's free everyday like last time....hurhurhur....during school days, everyone would be free everyday.....hehehehe....i miss childhood too annie...
if weather is fine and if i covered some of bio and IF im not lazy nuff, id wanna drop by sungei road to comb for great deals.....well....IF there is.....
i gotta smack my butt and get going and not slacking half the time im suppose to study....."SMACK!, SMACK!" OOoooowwwww....that hurts....nope i did not smack my own ass......hurhurhurhur...yah u all wished i did right?
i love 'the used' songs....though some of them are pretty too emo for my liking, hmm i wanna pester leo to loan me the cd....hehehehe.....then ill just add on to my itunes...heheheh
bored no mood
cant study, bored, no mood, blurr, confused, wondering, so i think id just go and sleep.
hmm
everytime i have a gf, theres sure someone pestering her.....so dumb of this guys, why keep on pestering someone who's already attached?...uggghh okla dont want to add more, no good talking bad bout ppl in ramadhan.....but im just irritated not jealous cos i know annie's irritated too....
my sayang wants to accompany me to study on tuesday...yeayness....im already planning mentally, study in library, break fast together, then go amk hub for movie or something.....hehehe
im off for now, continue with my bio...
friday is da day....
i cleared 3 presentations in a day....and i got an A for mental health.........
i fumbled abit at the presentations....but overall we did fine.....and i got great feedbacks so far....
went to watch chuck & larry just now with my sayang....hilarious, a must watch....
we went to habib together for the first time.....i dunno why im the shy one.....its bcos i guess i never brought any of my ex-gfs to meet my frens. went well....i love u annie....
i like the way annie dress today...nice...
im still left with one hurdle.....next week bio.....prac...then off to clinicals and exams in a month's time...
im lazy to add some more, cos im chatting annie now....see ya....gnite...ouh 3rd day of ramadhan....
new era
haha i submitted my foto to new era's website...hurhurhur and its approved, so ill just wait till my foto is up with the millions of new era fans.....thinking of getting one more next payday....
2 flexfit hallucinate caps is on the way.....its going to be sold at skateboarding.sg and probably skinnymunster.com. coolness i got 2 retailers wanting to sell my stuffs.. simple designs and nothing special just glad so far the people around me likes it and as i mentioned in the previous entry, i was also requested to design wedding cards...i roped in hairul and aisha bcos its their expertise im only an amateur, i self-taught so not really pro......woo shaggy playing on the radio again...i love shaggy's song... this angel song....so ol skool but still evergreen....girl ure my angel, annie...
annie.....u dont have to be good with words to show me u love me, u already did, u made sacrifices and u even tried fasting, that meant alot to me.....im hoping to itd work out. i dunno how but im sure we'll find a solution.....
i think i need to go for an eye check up and maybe an appointment with the orthopaedics specialist. im seeing floaters and my eyes tires easily......hmmmffft.....insyahAllah theres nothing wrong with me....and i think seriously i need my wound to get stictched up....it healed and then it gapes again...
first ramadhan, went thru with an ease....i managed my anger in the morning but i accidentally blurted out a swear word on the road, when this car cut right infront of me...have to kick that bad habit.....
im going to bed....soon....i love u annie...
u stole my heart, u put it by a nice place, u nurse it properly and u always ensure it doesnt get into any harm watsoever...i hope u keep it that way....u gave me attention, u understood my position, u needed little explanation. u accepted me for what i am. my heart isnt everywhere its hidden by annie somewhere, it was with me since last year when i took it back and no one during that period managed to take it from me, until came annie, she took it with the intention to look after it and nurture it with love...that i felt that no words can describe. its so real yet not visible to the naked eye but its there, i know....love ya...
ramadhan celebrations
celebrated ramadhan with me clearing my bcls....woots.....
annie tries fasting.....proud of her....
im being roped in to do wedding cards.....
and hallucinate tees is getting attention might be on sale at another site. woots
1 more customer for hallucinate tees....the lucha tee have gained its popularity, 2 lovers so far....woots....
im a happy son of a gun today.....minus the upset just now.
sigh
sigh...hate me all u want....its not as if i cheated on u, not as if i did not tell u we cant work out together....not as if i had another gf behind ur back....i only felt things after almost a year......i was comfortable being single until of course lately i met someone who is special to me....
u have rights to ur own feelings, hate me if u will, if that makes u feel better. call me a jerk or watever it is. for all i know, im not and i know i hurt u but i did not hide anything....i did not cheat on u and we did broke off last ramadhan....that makes a year in the muslim calendar....best wishes in watever u do. forgive me if ive done anything wrong.
ouh lastly in defence.....if my heart is everywhere, id have at least 10 over gfs and if my heart is everywhere, i wouldnt have lasted 3years in 1 of my relationships... ramadhan is a beautiful month but i just had to defend myself.
ramadhan
here comes the beautiful of ramadhan.....many hikmah behind it....well for me personally, apart from exercising self control, apart from feeling the poor what they are feeling and apart from refining myself.....i save money and i loose a little of the inches and pounds off me....heh!
yest, i met brielle aka annie aka my sayang....wanted to watched evan almighty but we couldnt make it in time and annie wasnt in the mood for horror so we just ate cake at secret recipe, i like mine, raspberry cheesecake but not hers, its nice but not my cup of tea, chocolate indulgance.... basically its already almost ten by the time we finished eating our cakes, every where would either be closed or going to close soon, so we decided with east coast....just walking, natter about everything and sitting by the sea where the waves came crashing on the walls that we sat on.....we bonded and yes very much in love....we just sort of as if we known each other for long....i only wondered why i didnt meet her earlier but hey, its fate...i believe in fate...im fated to meet her now only for a reason....so anyway annie started to feel sick....gastric pain i guess....so we left....i rode a little faster but safely cos theres a pillion behind me, someone i dearly love. i turn back occassionally to check if she's ok, my main priority then was to get her home safely or to a doctor should her pain get worse or something....so everything went well, its seperation time again, the toughest...how i wished i need not go....hmmmftt...but i had to...
im so in love and i hope, sincerely hope, this ramadhan id be given some directions, answers or anything, insyahAllah.....
i hope i clear my prac test tumoro and i hope the presentations on friday goes on smoothly and i hope to meet my annie friday night and probably we can iftar together. i appreciate that you are even trying annie, i really do. and finally i hope my bio prac next week goes on smoothly.....
to my muslim frens let us welcome this ramadhan...may all our ibadah be accepted and may we go thru all 'test' with iman and perseverance, insyahAllah....
to annie....i love u as always, enjoy ur holidays and wish me luck for my upcoming hurdles, my presentations, tests and exams in a months time...or not forgetting my clinicals....
skate session
just came back, just out of the shower.....
its been weeks since i last skated....just now was a short one...but hey it was fun as always....i cant ollie properly now....but i managed to 'catch' one kickflip after mimi pointing out my mistakes...the spot near boat quay have great low white kerbs, where noseslides are lovely but i cant pull off....nxt time maybe...wasnt too well just now, got a little runny nose.....
snapped a couple of fotos with my lomo....hope it turn out beautiful.....i seriously want to get an slr....i envy those shots shahran made....they look so professional...
my sayang.....she misses me alot that she smsed me at 4am in the morning...i miss u too
im excited about hallucinate.cc, i hope itd go well....i want to print one for annie too! she will be the first to wear hallucinate tee....heh....and i cant wait to see the cap i ordered, tumoro the seller going to email me the finished product and ship to me once i say yes....
good luck annie for the exam tumoro......good luck to myself for the bcls theory....
nite peepz.....and thanks adil for the ride home......i cant imagine if i have to ride my bike back just now....so tired.....i really really want a class3!
good news!
sheikh is going to help me sell my t-shirts at his online store....its a small start hopefully to something big.....and he's roping me in to help organize an upcoming skate event....sheesh im happy, i feel like flying....
study?
yup i dont always drink kopi at the kopishop known as habib, last night i had teh-o-ice limau. and adil got itchy finger and snapped a foto with my phone, thats boy aka eizhar aka agf beside me....he said the event at museum was great.....sigh, shouldve went...theres fireworks after the last band.....
was supposed to study, half way thru i got tired....so i doodled...its been along time since i scribbled on paper.....adil aka stimgas wanted to do graffiti on his walls, so here it is some scribbling....hurhurhur...
just decide to snap these....nothing else to snap....my daily cocktail before i sleep n when i wake up, for the immunity, for the knees and joints and for a balanced diet. i just dont want to be a burden when im old....im considering adding calcium tabs to the cocktail cos i dont take too much calcium daily, sometimes only i drink milk, i think ill start adding calcium when i start work.
I miss annie.....love her lots....she dreamt of us making cookies yest, is that a sign we'd be together forever?
gotta prepare the script for next weeks presentations.....even a seasoned presenter like me feel the pressure of 3 presentations in a day!...friday that is....i think i will need lots of coffee on thursday and more spirulina tabs.....
speaking of which my supply of elcafe ginseng coffee running low, gonna get some later at jurong east stockist also getting some mooncakes for annie's parents and dropping by westmall to get ink...my blank ink went dry on me last night...looks like almost 100bucks spent today....we'll see...
next week is when my money going to be spent the most....the t-shirts and materials for my hallucinate line.......and i think i need a new pair of bermudas going beach road to get a cheap pair or perhaps id just loose weight a little more to fit into my size 32 berms.....
ouh im waiting for my felxfit cap to arrive....yeayness.....
and tonight there might be a skate session.....
sigh
sigh time flies and shahreil n yati are getting married oredi.....and time flies and ramadhan is coming....they are already talking bout visiting....hmm 2nd week of raya.. a saturday, i hope my annie can make it.....and planning for iftar.....gotta find a suitable day so we all can sit down and breakfast together...itll be cool....
im wide awake now, bcos i slept in the evening.....now im going to go thru my bcls,i hope to have a perfect score cos its nothing new to me.....but i dunno if the test would be similar to that of the army one.....i hope so...
my annies asleep, sweet dreams, i hope u find the answers you're looking for. i love u lots. and im declaring it on the world-wide-web via my blog.
im seeing floaters....i hope its normal....but my lecturer told me if uve seen it once in awhile, its ok...but if uve never experienced it before, i better have my eyes examined......
sayang...i want to grow old with u...:)
changes
changed my stripey curtain after so long....clearing up my room...making it more tidy...ore images soon....cos my baby wanna see how my room looks like, im going orange this year but not painting as yet....probably after the exams.
sale
sold 1 14" tv, one 21" tv, one old nokia, i got 30bucks from the karung guni man, ok la pretty ok....
i shouldnt have but its done already...
i remembered when i skipped religious classes when i was young and gave stupid reasons just bcos i was lazy...muslim boys and girls go to formal religious classes not only to learn how to practise the religion but to know how it came bout, in other words the history. im pretty fine with the practice but im not so sure bout history. if i hadnt skipped classes and get kicked out last time, my knowledge wouldve come in handy when i have to explain to annie why is there christianity and islam and wats the differences.
i think i wanna start reading up again on my own religion and probably start going classes again, its about time already. probably annie came into my life is more than a blessing, more than making me just feel loved and happy, she came probably in away to make me start all over again with islam. thank you annie.
i dont know wat to do either
i do not know what to do either.
but it's not the end yet and i'm not giving up.
:)an evening with my annie....
thanks for the 'laundry basket' sayang.....heh :)....
was suppose to go out with annie....well we did but today we took the bus....met my sayang at bukit batok.....i tot she'd be late, so i went out and walked slowly until she msged, 'im here already..." .....hehe i hurried cos i dont wanna keep her waiting..
saw her at the bus-stop, she was reading some notes...it was after quite a long time since i took public transport. the journey was long but i was with my annie, i bet ill be bored to death if i was alone but with her by my side, i enjoyed every minute of the bus ride....though its a pretty long one.....we went to ikea actually wasnt our initial plan but bcos the weather's not that good, we decided to go public and since we go public, annie could go and get her rack...ate at bk, again, i think its been so long since i ate bk....was good, except the onion rings were cold.....
we walked around ikea....in my heart "how i wished we had our own house..." the furniture and stuffs.....sigh but i guess we'll have to wait.....i saw this cool basket, with a turtle as the lid, i tot itd make a great laundry basket....annie bought these cute fork n spoons and those colourful hangers....then she bought the rack she wanted to get......at the counter, she paid for my basket....heee...malu ar...but thank you annie...love ya....
it was early when we left ikea....was only 8++, i remembered boy told me about iron maiden's vans....so we went to ltd edition to take a look...hmmm not really my cup of tea, it wouldve been better if they made the design like the slayer version, simple.
i saw this new era, vans new era....niceness....hmm dunno whether to get or not.. maybe ill come back some day and see if its still there....hmm but actually im waiting for my hallucinate-flexfit cap to arrive....hmmm well, we'll see....
we took 61 back to bukit batok....annie walked with me to the bus-stop near my place to take 963. everytime at this point i find it hard to part with annie....i only wished she could stay a little longer, chill at my place or something....but we cant.
so patience ya, soon ill have a place of my own hopefully and we could chill all day or something.....or maybe just settle down...hurhurhur...
i love my annie....lots and i certainly hope we'd last....forever...:)
irritating
i have to jot this down, theres one old slut/bitch/whore in the class, she simply asked questions for the sake of asking and for goodness sake its your classmates presentation and you asked such a stupid question. the group were already stressed up having to present 2 ICAs in a day and you have to ask stupid questions. i almost made a rude remark but i resisted and went with sarcasm instead but it seems the bitch did not get it but some of my classmates did...apparently shes not only a bitch, shes a dumb bitch....ugggh...slut...so pissed off at the behavior, ure already 40odd and still behaving like an immature slut.....hmmfftttt
uggh
ppt presentations makin me dizzy, nauseas, drowsy.....ugggh...
good news first.....>>> till date, today a 3rd person says hallucinate-tees rock...
2nd good news, hallucinate-tees is expecting 2riders to endorse its tees and one Lomo-ers...hurhurhurhur
3rd good news, i know where to seek help and advice......
bad news.....my references...i cant find some of the authors....
bad news 2. frames are not ready, print outs are not readily edited to be printed..
bad news 3. still unable to source for AAAs via online
bad news 4. actual production of HCC tees might be delayed.
sorry haiqal, ratnor, ur tees have to wait a little longer i think, my guess mid november....and the riders too....
lastly love my sayang, tumoro ikea ok?
i hope u do too
sigh....im just crazy about u...i just hope everything works out....
meanwhile had a really one hell of group discussion just now at skool....research methods is really giving us hell of a problem.....and its irritating when it appears like only yahnee and me are cracking brains and theres an irritating parrot who just sways to where the wind blows....idiot abnn......lets not stress myself.
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i just have to say this, i could sit all day with u and stare at u all day.....i could sit with u in my arms and talk about nothingness all day. frankly i do not know how it turned out this way but who cares, im glad it did happen somehow or another.....the hurdles we might face, the obstacles rather....might be a tough one to face and day to day i cant help but to think about it....bt im staying optimistic whatever it is. aku sayang kau annie.
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adil smsed again...."nari sk8?" sorry dude.....cant la wrong day, tumoro i have 8am class. sorry.....but sunday i think ill skate for a while....
------------
gotta go and try to crack brains for the irritating research methods ICA.
------------
shes offline......sigh.....
im addicted
im addicted to 'plain white t's'-hey there delilah.
im addicted to annie toh.
im addicted to hallucinate tees, except they are not ready yet.
im addicted to lomo.
im addicted to skateboarding and experiencing withdrawal symptoms cos been a little bz.
was supposed to meet ma annie today but she not feeling well....but its ok, theres always another day....mutual understanding is important in every relationship.... and i think we just have that.
went imm with shahreil aka stimgam....hehehe buy water-heater.....
hmm got some researching to do....sigh....research method is such a hassle.....
i realise i seriously need to start bio revision, i cant recall and i cant answer the question annie asked me regarding spinal cord injury....hurhurhur....learning is never ending.....hurhurhur.....
okla thats all for today....lazey to type many2
stuck in skool
haiz....im stuck in skool.....my nose a little blocked and i feel lousy....seems like i cant meet my one and only tonight.....anyways, its pouring outside...not that heavily but i dislike riding in the rain. main reason, ill get wet and uncomfortable 2ndly, its dangerous with the road slippery and vision impaired by the rain droplets. so i tot wat the heck stay in school since i got my laptop with me, probably i could surf the net or something.....since im in no mood to do any revision right now in my current condition.
but hey, skools retarded, they block alot of media websites like the famous youtube or any music sites....fair enough u blocked video sites....but wats wrong with music? damn.....so retarded......so pissed, so not ok, so in a lousy mood, i guess macam girls having pms....hurhurhur.....
just now was our bcls lesson.....meaning cpr and things alike. im certified but i think its good to revise and recap what i never practise.....but it pisses me off when some ppl like they know alot of things and act....aiyer...for goodness sake, im certified and i myself dont act until like that....wah liew....grow up la....so old already still behaving like that....
hmm....i guess the nurse would help me recover, if only it was like last time when aisha could come over and chill at my place, watch videos or she surf the net while i do other stuffs....until the stepdad decide to make a big fuss about it....haiyer...
i guess if nothing's changed, i wouldve asked annie to come over....just chill at my place but i guess wont be possible now unless i got a place of my own....sigh...
well actually, even if im single now, i would still want a place of my own....bt haiz being in singapore....i cant....bcos im single and im not over 35 even if i am, i have to get another person in order to rent or buy....unless i got lotsa money to rent pvt.....macam pen last time...cool place she got....orange n pink walls...hurhur
projects pretty done.....tumoro finalize 2 of them and we are left with research methods....then....its all over, only waiting for bio prac test and bcls test before exams in late october n early november.....wooohooo then semester 3 complete by end of the year which means 6 more months to being registered as a nurse!!!
im still considering whether wanna ask shahrul to make me light box or not...hmmmm..
i guess ill just go to boys' place to make my templates.....
hmm i think i wanna nap while waiting for the rain to stop, the irritating thing is i cant see if it has totally stopped from the tinted windows in the library....darn...
watcha do to me....
it have to be the weekends....i always fall ill weekends...not the first time. luckily no plans watsoever as everyone is busy over the weekends...im now still recovering from runny nose and macam flu la....but not so bad...except my nose keeps on dripping.....
i got a request from haiqal to print 'I <3 LOMO'...patience dude....will be in no time...hurhurhur...hope to have fans, i hope.
im in love with the song by plain white ts, hey there delilah...
ouh annie watcha do to me? heh, i miss u la...
finished up my ppt. next research methods....i hate this module....but gotta stay positive need the marks....need to be the ones to be selected for advance dip. next time. if i get lousy grades, might not be selected.
my sayang, went shopping, i guess she had fun...would love to see what she bought....:)
gonna turn in pretty soon....need more rest.....didnt skate for a whole week for the first time. aiyah sick mah....
meeting my sayang tumoro.....:)....love ya Lijun.....
not easy
printings not easy....proven was just now...the print didnt transfer to the screen bcos the transparency wasnt dark nuff...hmmptff...wasted $14 but im not discouraged, ill try again....hopefully itd turn out ok next time....thnks boy. anyways i learn my lesson, the darker the better and double prints always! and no jagged edges....
im gonna edit my 'lucha' print before i sleep...
cloud 9
im floating....yah i know i might make my readers puke but im in love and i dont care, i wanna write what i feel....yesterday was beautiful...
hope to see u again soon baby.....:) dont worry, ill never go missing...u'll never loose me. just pray that nothing crosses our path or yours. i know its going to be a huge choice you are making and im glad ure even considering it. thank you. :)
im staying home on a saturday, one reason, she's celebrating her mommy's bdae, frens are out with their other halves and im down with runny nose, almost fluish....so here i am, not studying, cracking brains for my tees....tonight t-shirt printing night at the mini factory....haiqal, ud been getting ur t-shirt very soon. hope to see ur artwork soon. and if the bill fits, itll go an t-shirts.
its one of those weekends when everyones bz except me, well actually naz asked me out to skate but it was raining and i wasnt feeling too good to skate. tumoro yan is getting married, today yanto's bdae.
yani gave me the mouse she bought bcos it wouldnt work on her pc or laptop, it worked on mine, thanks yani and thanks for burning me that clockwork orange video.
sayang, hope to see u tumoro.....love ya.
hallucinations
coming november, hallucinate clothing company... watch out for their sick tees. locally designed & printed on quality made in mexico tees. give your local products support...heh! anyways hallucinate tees will be available mid-november at demonicspeed.blogspot.com
annie, see ya tumoro....so u talked to stimgas already...hahah adil sound like uncle2 hehehe.....farnie
fridae jalan, late at night t-shirt factory.
saturdae shoe fair cum foto session cum hunt for polaroids.
sunday revise bio and finish up projects.
boy im a busy guy......
starhub starbright...
well......i know im gonna sms a whole lot more as one of the reason i have a whole lot more frens now....each time theres a skate trip, im going to be sms-ing to around 6-7peeps....and whats more....i now have a sayang to layan.....so the readjusted mobile plan that is of 300sms and 80free outgoing is certainly not enough for someone like me with a wide network of frens...
i just had to swop plans....being a student, i took full advantage of my current status.....i downgraded to a student mobile plan. the amazing thing is, i pay about $4 less and i get 1000sms plus 100mins free outgoing.......it is definitely worth the $10 downgrading fee......now i can msg more to my sayang....and i can organize more skating trips without worrying of a larger bills, maybe larger but 700 more free smses does make a huge difference......yeayness.....
sayang, prepare for more sms-es from me......hurhurhur.....kla gotta go do my work....see ya late peeps....ouh man, the song on my frenster is so groovy dat i feel like swaying my body to it....well u wouldnt want to witness that...hurhurhurh....
i had to pass...
skating is my drug but i have responsibilities as well.....the urge to skate today is fucken great, the feeling of landing tricks and the laughters along with frens and just plain rolling down the streets amidst the moonlight.....but i just have to resist...cos tumoro i have lab in the morning...and i have to prepare...im weak in bio, if i come unprepared id be lost at the lab session.....and i dont wanna be sleepy in class and miss out pointers and i have some research and tutorial to complete.....sorry guys, next time maybe....perhaps u guys join me sundays? im getting darker as weeks gone by, cos of the super hot sun on sundays...hurhurhur....but hey, my passion for skateboarding.....just overides all those.....hope my sayang dont mind a slightly tanned sid....
i find that i miss u lots...hurhurhur....
soon babe, soon friday will come.....:)
i cleared my skills test.....yeayness...i can answer almost all of the questions that was given, though a couple of mini mistakes but i think i did fairly well.....im loving the song on my frenster, its by the teh-tarik crew featuring gerhana ska cinta....the song on my blog is also by GSC. like?
hmmm.......im loving life.....
adil fetched me just now at 5+pm...in search for a new board....sorry sayang last minute plan, couldnt ask u along......we ended up at sheikh's store cos go-sports were closed and bobo's stock haven't arrive......little-sheikh was uber frenly and adil got a city-skateboards board....mike maldonado pro model...nice...concaves and all.....enjoy ur new board tonight adil!
i love that toy-machine board but too bad ive already bought mystery 2 weeks ago...
gotta go.....sambil2 do tutorial, research, bio, and msn with my sayang ...multi-tasking ....hurhurhur.....u guys should employ me!
rindu
aku rindu kau....:)
had about 2hrs of skating with shaun...and derrick i guess thats his name...
that kid derrick have been trying to ollie up the low kerb ever since i started skating sundays...thats like more than 3weeks...today he did it, with shaun's nagging....
i, i 'tyco-ed' an ollie manual, i landed sketchy kickflips and i made a new fren, riduan, more sunday mornings skate frens.....i think, my determination will pay off.
tumoro skills test...hmmm.....hope my classmates will spot out any mistakes i do in the morning so i wont do it during the test at 3pm....
i feel like meeting my annie, ntahla cam rindu gitu.....and i tot of going down sungei road looking for polaroid cams....if they have....i think, ill jus head to the barber, have a haircut and go home, rest and prepare for tumoro....we'll see.....
anyways, annie going to learn to cook....yeayness......
im craving for.....another new era, a polaroid and my annie everyday...hurhurhur....
few hours ago...
it was few hours ago ard 10pm when i read something in the tiny msn dialogue box that made me happy cos what i read meant hope. the main thing is, she is willing, the parents, the rest can wait.
i dunno why i think so far cos im always afraid along the way something mightve happen but i guess i got so much faith in this one that from the beginning knowingly of the problems that mightve arise i still step in and go on with it.
got the 2 tees from boy-eizhar just now.....paid him 19bucks and i got a 2 nice plain 3As tees up for printing next friday....wat design i don't know yet.....hmmm for all u know, i might just print another santa-cruz or something
haiqal told me not to get polaroids from clubsnap, he told me a secret place where i might land myself a polaroid for like 2-3times cheaper....i think ill drop by sometime after school.....yeayness...next time can snap polaroids with my sayang....but the turn off is $34 for a catridge of 20shots....thats uber ex......but hey...for the fun of it..
i think ill go sleep....i guess annie's asleep but her msn is still on....
ratatouille
ratatouille....was our first outing together...well its not as if we've not met before, its just the first one....if you know wat i mean....ok to the movie, was a great one, farnie and a little touching which i cant believe a cartoon could have....the graphics was great, the story line, ok-ok.....overall i would rate 5mentos...bcos i was only eating mentos in the cinema just now.....
hmmm, me and annie......i think...yeah...we're it....well....
i think we'll have more outings together.....fun outings....
anyways guys, sorry i cant skate cos ive already booked the tickets on thursday and i already made plans with annie and i didnt expect u all to skate fridays cos usually many cant make it on a friday.....next time maybe yeah? and im sorry adil i couldnt reply ur msgs bcos i was in the cinema.....:) nxt time we'll surf the concrete waves again....
go watch ratatouille....but i think evan almighty will be a whole lot better.....
hmmm
my hearts racing...i dunno...im nervous...hahahaha
hmmm....aiyah nvm la
anyways got a presentation tumoro....n im not really prepared...i mean my ppt all done, except, its me....hmmm gotta be finalize my 'speech' and dazzle the class as always hurhurhurhur...
bz gotta go, just a short one today....
anyways, see u tumoro annie....
veterans division
due to work commitments, etc...its rare that we can get together on the same day to skate. some of us work shifts, some have to wake early the next morning for office, some like me on course studying and some have to tend to their shop. yesterday was the rarest day that 14skaters came just to have fun and live their passion of skateboarding, pro or lousy(like me) we were all having fun.....our fun was short-lived when the cops came.....the lights were not supposed to be on and our names were taken down and being submitted to mcys i dunno for wat fuck....yesterday was not the only night the lights were on....apparently we were the unlucky ones...to be found skating after the opening hours...it was major, 9cops i guess.....most of us, lost our mood to ride last night.....we rode awhile in the dark....before deciding to stop and have supper at prata place just after botanic gardens...
cool hang out, cool makan but not all la....the maggi adi,mimi and adil had sucks... ratnor had this cool maggie hidden inside prata...or should i say maggi filled prata.
naz had tissue plus hersheys....the drinks were ubber cool, blended rambutan, longan, etc....we chilled, talked, joked, had last cup of teh each before heading home. i felt a little tired and im grateful adil drove yest, enjoy the aircon and the same time made me really2 want to get a class3......
hmm though our flames of passion were kinda distinguished by the cops yest but it went ablaze shortly after....even now, im thinking of scouting for generators for lights or manufacturing companies to make us grind rails....aiyah many tots la...
cant believe these old birds, ranging from 24-30+ years old still have the passion to skate after all these years.....
okok so-so
my test was ok-ok la except for my careless mistakes...but i think i can easily get a C or B.......
im half-dead now....but i want to skate tonight....its rare that i can get almost all the guys together in one day to skate together2....i dunno la...tonights session is more like me relieving off some stress and celebrate the end of one paper and more to come...hurhurhur...
hmmm im just wondering though this few days....bout something..hurhurhur...
when ure in love....
no not love those mushy2 cinta2 katun....
its love for something....macam skateboarding....
was supposed to skate with osman, shaun, adi and yanto.....but osman couldnt make it, yanto have a game of soccer and adi work....shaun, well poor turnout....i tot id pass, no skating this week....relax....but i just had to try my new mystery board....my feet itched....i wiggled in bed for about half hour before i decide to shower and go skating myself.....
so i was at somerset at 10am under the hot sun....put my deck down....and pop an ollie....god, the trucks suck... its the bushings...the bushing suck...i cant tighten it....to cut the story short, grindkings stock bushings suck....but hell yeah it can grind.... i did 50-50s most of the time with no problem...no stalls...the only thing is, i had trouble pulling off.....ive got a mini improvement....almost landed that heelflip...but terbalik... ala by luck one...i hope with new bushings i can pull it off....i was frustated though, unable to pull off the 50-50s and ollie up that probably 3-4decks high ledge....i forgot what i initially wanted to try, late shove its, no complys and boneless.... urrghhh forgot again my objectives....next round.....
class starts at 11am on tuesday and wednesday....im tempted to skate at night....monday night or tuesday night....i hope the guys are skating on either days.
i badly wanna ollie up that ledge.....and try what ive been having on my mind....
ok lets switch subjects....revision not going so well....2days and not maximised... im not satisfied with my performance...i mean, revising...i can 'vomit' out the info... i hope tumoro goes well, im aiming for a B at least.....i dont want any Cs this semester....im staying optimistic....
im staying optimistic with other stuffs too.....i hope things work out....ive never had this kind of attention for quite a long time....although theres differences that we cant avoid, im staying optimistic.
i despise 2-timers....and shame on you, i regarded u as my own sister and i dont know why you have to be the same like the rest....and whats more your attitude towards it.
trust
a major issue in part of my life.....my level of trust has been damaged along my timeline of life.....from even at a tender young age.....ppl around me display acts of deception, lies and many alike......and in my adolescent stage i got into a few relationships that really betrayed my trust. nursing helped me gain some back again... i learn alot from nursing and i hope nobody will try to destroy what im building again.
i trust very few people and when i put that trust i hope they wont take advantage of it.
i think again and again im fated to do psychiatry....some or another it helps me, my mental health and i know itll help me along my journey in life. in life, physical strength is just a part of it, the other part is psychological strength.
and all that has happened in the past has made me psychologically stronger.....
satudyday....
today supposed to be my final revisions day....no going out, deprive myself of entertainment and focus....but im ubber lazy and im itching to join haiqal and the lomo peoples to shoot......but the angle in me told me, "sid ure running low on cash even if u follow them shooting you could probably develop your films only next week and sid you have a blardy theory test on monday mind you...." ouh yeah he's pretty harsh at times but he has to do it to discipline me.
yeay i had alot in mind after yesterdays conversations.....we were talking about wat to do if we go out....tons of ideas.....and boy aka eizhar is gonna teach me rollerblading so i can show off and teach annie...hurhurhur....we were talking about mini bikes too.. i wonder if they would really get one.....i think i will most probably get one when i start my real job....got more money to spend mah......i was suggesting having a race at the multi-storey carpark......i like ppl who like to try new things and not stick around within their 'cube' in their comfort zone onli....life is more colourful when you explore, do different things and meet different people....thats i love 'people' job. you know what i mean, macam sales, teaching, nursing.....its alot less boring...
then desk bound jobs...where u stare at the screen for 8hours or more.....well it depends la but if its doodling its fun too...
i cant wait to have all the fun....but in order to have all those, i have to get good grades first and make sure ramla(IMH-HR) says "ya ive seen ur grades, pretty good!" again.....hehehehe (eksyen la tu...)
talking to chinese girl in malay
its farnie.....we've been trying to have conversations in malay...of course, i end up as the teacher......hurhurhur...but kinda fun actually.....
mystery shirt
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
i will fit into my mystery shirt again.
things fell into place
ive been recieving alot of attention lately, nope its not that i wear thongs everywhere i go....its a different kind of attention, one i felt years ago....
and i tell u, the feeling is great.......she said the same too.
again as usual, theres always a problem amidst the joy......and for once is a totally new problem, religion, the differences, race i believe isnt a problem.
i asked my classmate who is rather close to me, we bitch about stuffs over msn and sometimes we spill over to personal issues, well she said, if it were her, she wouldnt mind changing, shes a dumbass when it comes to this matter....its easier for her to say cos she's sort of a free-thinker.....
i asked a fren of mine also....ouh shes a muslim....she says dont waste my time if the other party has no intention...
sigh but then again....i got other things to worry like completing my final year of nursing and skateboarding....well not really worry bout skateboarding more like whens the next session dudes...my legs itching to pop kuih lopez.....hurhurhur....
hmm i was watching teevee with mommy, when i saw the animation of gila makan, looks very familiar, can recognise whose work is it....if its not hers then the designer have very similar style...niceness....
speaking of niceness, ive stumbled upon the cartoon, somebody drew years back...i still love it and im gonna have it printed on a tee soon nuff when i have cash for tees.......
ive gotta go....finish up assignments.....my classmates trust me to do my work and i will not betray my trust....well its more about responsibility.
speaking of responsibility, im sorry guys i cant attend the celebration on sunday, i have to study for monday's test, i hope to do well...i really hope so...ive planned my sort of timetable....morning skate and be back by 3pm for final revisions, sleep soundly before midnight and be ready for the test on monday....its not that i dont want to join u guys...u guys too mean alot to me but i have a responsibility to myself and to my friends who signed the bond with me that trusted me to study and do well.....:)
thnks adil
thnks frens for wanting to help me just now....it was such a silly mistake, i learnt my lesson....
before the test on monday, i told myself, i will not get myself a new deck until payday if i dont get an A....I got a C....
monday i went scouting for decks....but turns out i didnt find something, i really2 like and prices was steep.....
tuesday aku degil....and stupid me tot my ledger balance could be used......i went to tony's get what i wanted and when i was about to pay, declined.....turns out i cant use my ledger yet but i do have 60bucks...i was short of $35. so i called my closest of frens....from shahreil, jabrul, adi, and adil...and some of them could not be reached due to work and stuffs....adi was at work, shahreil had no spare, shahrul too and he's at home, adil was at IMM and he had spare...phew.....thnk adil for saving me....i have spare cash at home, i been trying to save some spare cash......luckily indeed i put aside 50bucks at home with the intention to start a savings.....sigh but i have to use it.....but my coin bank is still untouched...i shall refrain from using it...unless i really have to....right now, i got $75 to survive on until the 25th......that makes about 10days.....saturday i wont be spending any money....and if i keep to less than 7bucks a day, i can make it...petrol pumped already, so shouldnt be a problem. alhamdullilah......syukur.....
ive got another problem in mind actually....but i guess it wouldnt be a problem as time goes by(i hope so).......its regarding race and religion......
hmm
C for my research test...damn....english so chim....
annie, you made my day.....:)
im struggling with scripts for role-play!
a new deck is going to burn holes in my pocket cos of the price hike....hope tony still have those 74bucks decks....
films are going to burn holes as well cos ive bought over a lomocolorsplash from haiqal and i have the intention to participate and submit some fotos for the event 'tikam-tikam'.
i think i will need new brake pads and tyres soon...that will burn some more holes....
i think.....hehehe ar
today i got a time limit set. im supposed to sleep by 1 am.
maybe thats why the fragmented sentences.
i envy adi and the guys surfing concrete at somerset tonight.
sori sheikh i love that zero or mystery but im tight on budget.
annie reminded me that fasting coming....13th september.
since she reminded, she must come jalan raya with me..heh!
gnite peeps. cheerios....
eksyen time.....
all this DIY....thnks boy for the equipments and help...and shahreil for the heroes and im going to reprint veterans division cos im not satisfied....
